Medicated
Things got to the point where they just weren't working out, I went through a period where I didn't think I wanted to do student affairs anymore (still not completely sold), I went through a period where I wanted to leave Tallahassee immediately, went through a period where I didn't want to be alive. And almost wasn't. But now is a time for permanant changes, which will subtly be announced here. Needless to say, I am described as having mild to severe symptoms of depression and anxiety, with possible future looking into ADHD. For all the undergraduate time I spent studying where drugs can go wrong, I'm now one of those people on meds. I don't know where they'll take me, hopefully it'll be somewhere else, but the most important thing is not succuming to the wants, desires, or expectations of others. For now, I feel very sedated and drowsy, and kind of agitated. Coming back from a great weekend at the mouse land right back into my pit of despair hit me harder than it needed to, especially with the anxiety of taking my first pill the night we got home. One day, maybe I'll have my shit together, but I could talk for hours about my problems and all I'd do is come off as more self centered than I already am, which you'd find is an impressive feat to the people around me.
